he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
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