you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
