I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
