Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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