I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
