bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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