I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
