we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
