worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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