did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
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