After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
