dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
