Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
She said her name was "party"
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
