Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
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