Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
