If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Randomize
