Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
