then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize