No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
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