Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up�
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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