i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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