I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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