The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
