i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
