Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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