Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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