Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
