Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
