Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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