I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
