Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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