i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
