ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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