It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
