I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
So much Jack, so little girl.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
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