So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
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