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i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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