Dual....:-)
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize
