I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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