Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
