I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
