I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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