i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
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