I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
