I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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