I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
