? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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