I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
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