that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
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