the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
My apartment stinks of burning failure
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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